Elmer's Brother

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2006/11/10

Man Rule #1

@ 07:47 AM (22 months, 5 days ago)
Never take a bath without your wife....

Comment(s) »

  1. #2 - Going to the mall to shop together is so off limits, there is always something else to do.

    Comment by Joe Gringo— 2006/11/15 @ 10:38 AM — (Reply)

  2. Never get sucked into giving your input about paint colors, furniture or fabrics for the house and never agree with your wife when she says she is fat and ugly...simply say she isn't fat.

    Comment by Barry G.— 2006/11/15 @ 11:43 AM — (Reply)

  3. never wear socks with sandals or flip flops

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/15 @ 03:58 PM — (Reply)

  4. Never use Botox.

    Comment by Barry G.— 2006/11/15 @ 04:08 PM — (Reply)

  5. never get a hairpiece it's better to be bald

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/15 @ 04:11 PM — (Reply)

  6. no whitie tighties

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/15 @ 04:11 PM — (Reply)

  7. Not watching Oprah.

    Comment by Barry G.— 2006/11/15 @ 04:28 PM — (Reply)

  8. not watching Martha Stewart

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/15 @ 05:39 PM — (Reply)

  9. never get your wife a clothes iron for Christmas get her a vacuum cleaner instead

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 02:39 AM — (Reply)

  10. along with the vacuum, get her that little French maids outfit, you'd be surprised out how much she likes to vacuum.

    Comment by Joe Gringo— 2006/11/16 @ 03:53 AM — (Reply)

  11. joe I think you just gave me a great idea....

    another one

    always compliment her not the outfit

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 06:51 AM — (Reply)

  12. never watch brokeback mountain

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 07:13 AM — (Reply)

  13. Never ask her to explain how shoes could cost $400.

    Comment by Michael— 2006/11/16 @ 07:47 AM — (Reply)

  14. never once suggest plastic surgery...even if it's a boob lift

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 07:55 AM — (Reply)

  15. Hi Michael...

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 07:56 AM — (Reply)

  16. Hey, EB. Sorry to butt in, but I couldn't resist. :lol:

    Comment by Michael— 2006/11/16 @ 08:01 AM — (Reply)

  17. I'm grateful you stopped by. I think it's great man. Feel free.

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 08:02 AM — (Reply)

  18. Another suggestion:

    If she died, you would be miserable. You could never find anyone that could replace her. And you certainly would NOT even dream of asking her friend out on a date. Practice those lines until they are believable.

    Comment by Michael— 2006/11/16 @ 08:08 AM — (Reply)

  19. hahahaha that's a good one

    My wife already knows that I am so high maintenance that if she goes before me I would have to remarry. She's (fortunately) cool with me saying that.

    BTW Michael you should really start a blog of your own. You're very intelligent and well spoken. Even if you lean the other way.

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 08:10 AM — (Reply)

  20. I wish I could, EB. I'm too busy trying to save Cate from her conservatism. :cool:

    Comment by Michael— 2006/11/16 @ 09:03 AM — (Reply)

  21. Can a woman interject?

    Always say "Old girlfriends? No baby, there was never anyone before you!"

    Comment by Cate— 2006/11/16 @ 08:51 AM — (Reply)

  22. ...and there will never be anyone after....bwahhahahaha!

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 09:25 AM — (Reply)

  23. ditch the birth control glasses

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 10:03 AM — (Reply)

  24. Michael good luck with Cate cuz I don't think she needs saving

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 10:03 AM — (Reply)

  25. cate, you can interject but you must ask politely...man rule #32

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 10:04 AM — (Reply)

  26. never tell her she looks good before putting on her makeup

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 12:18 PM — (Reply)

  27. never tell this joke:

    How do you tell if you're in a feminist bookstore?








    There's no humor section

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 12:24 PM — (Reply)

  28. uh bow ties are out too

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/16 @ 12:28 PM — (Reply)

  29. Never forward man bashing jokes you receive from friends. These should be immediately deleted. If a man sends you such a joke, either block him or email him to stop forwarding these type of jokes to any men.

    Comment by Barry G.— 2006/11/16 @ 01:11 PM — (Reply)

  30. never eat a hot sauce that requires you to sign a medical waiver

    and # 96...never go to the bathroom without washing your hands after cutting up fresh jalapenos..I hated learning that one the hard way.

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/18 @ 03:32 PM — (Reply)

  31. emr987g a ne2095uhta nsniy95ohgna ******* nw43)))) tehwou%%%%%!!!

    take that!

    usable

    Comment by nanc— 2006/11/18 @ 03:51 PM — (Reply)

  32. bwahahahaha nanc somehow I didn't think you could resist my email....I have that effect on women...and that's man rule # 54

    Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/11/18 @ 03:55 PM — (Reply)

  33. never let them know what you're thinking.

    woman rule #7

    scold

    Comment by nanc— 2006/11/18 @ 06:06 PM — (Reply)

  34. No fair. Copying Hillary's rules doesn't count.

    Comment by Barry G.— 2006/11/18 @ 06:11 PM — (Reply)

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