One ringy dingy, Two ringy dingy
From a conversation at NeoConcommand Center
The question was asked "What would it be like if we could crank call OBL?"
Elmer's Brother
OBL: Hello?
Click.......
________________________________
OBL: Hello?
Caller: Yes is this OBL? Pardon me would you have Mohammed in a box?
OBL: Who is this?
Caller: Well you better let him out!
_________________________________
OBL: Hello?
Caller: Is this the Taliban hotline?
OBL: (turning to his friends in the cave)
Did we publish that 800 number yet?
OBL's cohorts: Yea contacted Qwest yesterday we're all set.
OBL: Yes this is the Taliban hotline?
Caller: I'd like to report someone listening to Taylor Hicks.
OBL: That's Haram! (turning to one of his cohorts) I thought we voted for the virgin McPhee?
Cohorts shrug shoulders
______________________________________
from Brooke
OBL: Hello?
Caller: Yes, I would like to register a complaint about this bomb belt you sold me...it didn't result in my suicide, and only took out a couple of infidel children.
OBL: How exactly did it malfunction?
Caller: Well, it only blew off my left leg, and my wives are most certainly not houri virgins. One of them even has a mustache.
OBL: I'll be happy to assist you sir. All I need is the model number located on the sizing tag in the back of the belt.
Caller. Uh-huh. Let me check....No, that part got blown up.
OBL: Oooh... I'm sorry sir, but removal of the tag voids the warranty.There's nothing I can do.
Caller: What? This is clearly your brand, and obviously it didn't work; I'm still alive!
OBL: Sorry, sir, you'll have to take it up with Mohammed, PBUH!
Caller: What? How the hell can I take it up with Mohammed, PBUH? The damn belt didn't kill me!
OBL: *click*
__________________________________________
from Nanc
i TERRORIZE just BOMB pray ASSASSINATE they're YELLOWCAKE listening AHMADINEJAD to WMD me!
if y'all don't hear from me for awhile...oh, no...HERE THEY COME...
_________________________________________
Elmer's Brother
OBL: (in his best imitation of Lilly Tomlin) One ringy dingy two ringy dingy
Zarqawi: Helllllow
OBL: Is that you #2?
Zarq: Osama...is that you? How's the Misses (plural)? Seen the sun lately..you old dog?
OBL: The sun..what's that? hahaha
Seriously I wanted to warn you to stop calling Howard Dean, supposedly GW is tapping the phones over there.
Zarq: Well I haven't talked to old Howard since he imitated your donkey during the primary, but I'll take it into consideration. off topic here...Say have you seen Brokeback Mountain?
OBL: They filmed it here, I nearly lost my falafel when they kissed. Kind of reminded me of old times..well hell I remember back in SA...
Zarq: Excuse me Sheikh but I haven't seen it yet and I really wish you wouldn't spoil the ending.
OBL: Oh sorry. I loved it. Let's just say at least one American gets screwed hahahaha.
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noooooooooo - i'm still trying to get up off the floor from the last session!!!
Comment by nanc— 2006/05/26 @ 08:02 AM — (Reply)
This is a fantastic thing to run into after writing about Iran
Comment by Rosemary— 2006/05/26 @ 06:55 PM — (Reply)
The censors wouldn't let my call go through.
Comment by Always On Watch— 2006/05/27 @ 02:52 AM — (Reply)
You know, ever since we had those conversations, Bushco (
) has been tapping my phones.
Comment by Brooke— 2006/05/27 @ 08:50 AM — (Reply)
Comment by Elmers Brother— 2006/05/27 @ 08:55 AM — (Reply)
"Yeah Mom, that's the latest from PM...Wait. Mom, do you hear snoring?"
Comment by Brooke— 2006/05/27 @ 02:44 PM — (Reply)